Save Your Life, Prevent Zombie Hunger

Zombies enjoy Ghoul-AID!

How to Prevent Zombies from Suffering the Hunger!

Zombies created by reputable zomporiums with licensed necromancers are less likely to eat your face. With the proper necromancer magic, zombies stop decaying, maintain better skin-muscle cohesion, and do not lose eyeballs, tongues, and toes.

In other words, don't cheap out and buy from an unauthorized zombie dealer or with an out-of-country mill operation. Illegally made zombies are more likely to attack humans and animals, and the inferior creation process means extremities detach, guts spillage occurs, and skin flakes off.

However, the most important aspect of zombie ownership is ensuring that your zombies never suffer from the Hunger. Zombies require annual necro-immunizations against the Hunger--or weekly doses of appetite suppressants (such as Ghoul-AID).

Fun Fact: One of Molly Bartolucci's friends is Trina Molina, whose father invented and manufactures Ghoul-AID on a global scale! 

Want to know more about Molly? Love zombies? Get your copy of UNCHOSEN, Book 2 of The Reaper Diaries, by Michele Vail today!

What if Your Zombie Gets the Hunger?

Your first course of action is to get as far away from your zombie as possible and call the Zombie Enforcement Unit. ZEU is well trained in the capture and disposal of non-compliant zombies, especially those in the throes of the Hunger.

Who ya gonna call? Zombie busters!

Get to a secure hiding place or to a weapon. Many zombies owners keep bats, machetes, or guns loaded with zombie bullets as preventative measures. Zombies don't give up, run fast, jump long distances, and have no emotional or rational abilities. No matter how long you've had your zombie, you will always be in danger should it get the Hunger.

Michele Vail loves zombies, and that's why she follows all the laws and protocols for zombie ownership. Support authors who support zombies ... Buy UNCHOSEN now!

Kindness and Respect for the Walking Dead

Unfortunately, zombie abuse occurs across all levels of society. Zombies who are not provided suitable shelter, inappropriate clothing, annual well-being visits to their zombie makers, and/or who are verbally and physically assaulted will often be victims of the Hunger. Neglectful zombie owners are far more likely to get eaten than those who approach zombie ownership with kindness and respect. We invite you to watch this PSA presented by Citizens for Zombie Rights. Please report zombie abuse!

Interested in zombies ... ghosts ... ghouls ... reapers? You'll get all the paranormal you want in the newest book from teen fiction author Michele Vail. Get your copy of UNCHOSEN today! 

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Head In The Clouds

Owner Eaten by Illegal Zombies at Las Vegas Home

Nathan Richardson, a 54-year-old pawn store employee, was found dead in his Summerlin home on Tuesday evening. A concerned neighbor noticed Richardson's two zombies shambling down the street--apparently following their owner's pet Chihuahua--and she called the police. 

Richardson's remains were discovered in his kitchen, next to a partially opened case of Ghoul-AID. Police speculated that Richardson waited too long to feed the zombies, who were overtaken by the Hunger, and killed him as he was trying to give them the appetite suppressants.

“He was too cheap to take care of his zombies,” said Celia Monroe, a long-time resident of the same Summerlin neighborhood. According to Monroe, Richardson had been reported for zombie abuse at least twice in the last year. “Those poor things never had any proper shoes and they were always getting caught on the fence. No wonder they gobbled him down like a Thanksgiving turkey.”

Further investigation revealed that Richardson had bought his zombies from a black-market facility in Mexico, one of many “zombie mills” notorious for using illegally obtained bodies and minimal necro-magic. 

“People purchase zombies from these mills because they’re less expensive than going through traditional zombie-making services,” said Detective Art Kline from the Zombie Enforcement Unit. “Most zombie attacks and owner deaths can be traced to these illegal mills. The problem is that the moment when we shut one down, another one pops up.”

Police worked with the Zombie Enforcement Unit to capture the zombies, who were taken to the ZEU facility in North Las Vegas.As per federal law, the zombies who attacked Richardson will be de-animated and cremated. 

Richardson’s Chihuahua was not harmed by the zombies, and has since been adopted by Monroe.